January 4 - Do you like me?
The question for the day is "do you like me?" Do you care if people like you? I really didn't want to address this topic, but it won't let go, so I'm going there. I need to discuss something about me. Now that sounds self-centered, doesn't it?
Remember when Rick Warren said, "It's not all about you." And he is so right, but to get over myself I need to confess this to you. I really want you to like me. You may say everyone feels that way, but truth is, some people don't care if you like them or not. With me, it has always been important to be liked. As a child I learned early on that I could please people by certain behaviors. If I smiled sweetly, spoke politely (for the most part), gave hugs, looked adults in the eyes and obeyed them when they could see me, they would like me. Teachers were easy: they just wanted a peaceful classroom, a student who tried very hard and did her homework. Worked like a charm. With adults it worked mostly the same. With my peers, I found they liked me better when I was pleasant, was bossy when they needed to follow someone, helped them with their homework or problems, and said what they wanted to hear for the most part, too. Tada! I was popular. When I was around a person, I had a sense of what that person needed and filled it if I could. Generally, I was tenderhearted toward people and found out early on that most people had things about them that I liked, too. Sometimes I had to look harder to find it, but it was always there. I also liked shy people. One reason is that I had a very shy brother and early on, I saw how painful shyness can be. Since I wasn't shy, it was easy to help them. I could be their spokesperson or make them feel comfortable. Shy people were drawn to me because I saw it and really wanted to help, to make them feel comfortable, at least with me. Scott used to joke that one of the reasons he married me was that he never had to feel shy or make "small talk" at a party. Funny how opposites often attract. Ok, so I could do popular. That is not the problem or if you look at it another way, it is the problem.
God made me this way. He put a "friendly" gene in me. This is one of the gifts that has a double-edge to it. It can be bothersome, especially if I want to be in a hurry or efficient. It can be embarrassing to others, particularly your children. But the real down side is that I am a "people pleaser." It hurts when I think I am not liked or popular. I like to think that people like me and that can also be a handicap. When I am called to step out, step up and boldly tell others of the "good news" of Jesus, it can be difficult for me. Boldness is not the same thing as friendliness. After all the hearer (could be you) may not want to hear about salvation. Maybe "religious" people turn them off, or make them uncomfortable. Remember, I want you to be comfortable in my presence. But, I do believe God can use a "people pleaser."
If you are not like me, please know that I "get" you. We have something in common. Yet wanting to please others more than anything else does not please God. Why? Because He wants the first desire of our hearts to be to please Him at any cost. Even at the cost of being popular. So, does He want me to stop being friendly? Of course not. For me, that would almost be like stopping breathing. What He does want is for me to use my "friendly" gift for Him, to win others to Him, to draw them to the reason for my joy. God wants us to be friendly and joyful in Him alone. To give out the real joy that only comes from forgiveness of sin. I do want to be your friend. I am sincerely interested in you. In addition to liking me back, it is my desire for you to know Jesus. So as I talk to the strangers in my world or friends or family, I am asking God to help me give out the message of the one true friend we have in Jesus Christ. I hope you still like me after this self-centered rambling message. I want Jesus to be honored by my friendliness today and that you also know Him as your best friend.
"Don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God." James 4:4
"Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command." John 15:12-14
"Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness, and he was called God's friend." James 2:23
Pray: Help us today, Father, to be friends to each other, to love You more than the world and to give out the truth boldly to a needy people. Amen
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